Attachment

Attachment is the buzz word in our home. Even though it has been a year, we are still struggling with attachment and all the behaviors that come with it.

I just read a fantastic book regarding attachment and thought I would share.

Facilitating developmental attachment: the road to emotional recovery and behavioral change in foster and adopted children by Daniel M. Hughes. Hughes is the same author who writes about Katie in his Building the bonds of attachment: Awakening love in deeply troubled children.

Both books are a great mix of theory, vignettes, and practical advice. They have reminded our family of the most important word: empathy.

Empathy is hard. Empathy is the most important thing for me to work on. It is easy enough when Maks is sad or happy or a little angry. But when Maks feels persistently angry... it tends to make me feel angry, too.

I have been trying some of Dr. Hughes techniques, trying not to personalize any behaviors and it is really helping me stay empathetic during the angries. For any adoptive moms out there having some trouble with your babies ... read these books!